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| So the past few days have been alright.
Just kind of getting back into some sort of routine.
Filling out paperwork, and planning for trips and junk.
I got a pair of boy jeans the other day.
Its the same kind of Levi's that got me hooked on girl jeans in the first place.
I keep getting phone calls from the military recruiters.
If there was a "Red Dawn" scenario going on right now, I would join those wolverines in a heartbeat.
But I just dont think that I could fight in desert combat.
There was a stranger at the mall that told me something the other day.
He said "You're bound for something bigger than firefighting".
And I know it doesnt really mean much, cause he doesnt know me and all.
But it still makes me think.
Maybe I should be something else?
Granted, I could never be a lawyer or judge cause dealing with the rawness of humanity that they face every day would kill me.
But maybe something else? Nothing political, since the subject disgusts me.
Maybe an engineer in Africa or South America.
Anything that doesnt keep me behind a desk all day.
Well Jesus Christ I'm not scared to die.
I'm a little bit scared of what comes after:
Do I get the gold chariot?
Do I float through the ceiling?
Do I divide and pull apart?
'Cause my bright is too sly to hold back all my dark.
And this ship went down in sight of land.
And at the gates does Thomas ask to see my hands?
| | |
| Well, Christmas was yesterday.
And I got about four hours of sleep.
It was kind of hard to be excited for the gifts this year.
I guess its because I can actually buy things now, as opposed to when I was younger.
Ive been thinking about the reality of Christmas.
How this day, we remember that Christ became flesh and blood.
Its strange to think that God was once a baby, unable to speak or fend for Himself.
It seems absurd to even think that the God of the universe would lesser Himself.
But I guess thats just because selfishness plays a part in my actions, so I wouldnt act the same as God.
It really is amazing that God would take on pain and suffering for me.
But I suppose thats why He's good. Anyways, heres some photos. 
As you can see, its still dark outside. 
I got 2 things of shirts, a suitcase, "The Devil and God are raging inside of me" by Brand New, Velvet Elvis, Blue like Jazz, a pictureframe that I love, and 90 Minutes in Heaven 
Then I got a CD player for my car. No more cassettes for me. Happy late Christmas. | | |
| Ive kind of given up on xanga.
But I suppose Il update whenever I have something to say.
Things are good, but somewhat confusing right now.
Life has been good to me since my last update. And Im amazed at how I take it for granted.
I spent the day with Katie and Margaret yesterday.
I think we went everywhere worth going to in olathe.
Ive been thinking a lot about my relationship with God recently.
I think I know what Hes trying to teach me, but I could be wrong.
My car has a flat tire from yesterday.
Im trying to figure out what to get people for Christmas. Im not having much luck though.
Im getting my hair cut on tuesday. I think Im going short again.
Thanksgiving is this week. Im not all that excited to be honest.
I also need to go to the dentist sometime this month.
Ive decided to cut TV out of my life [With a few exceptions of course].
I ordered "Velvet Elvis" from the library last week.
After reading that, I only have one other book on my "Books that were suggested to me" list.
And oh, there I go showing off again,
Self impressed by how well I can put myself down!
And there go again! To the next further removed level
of that same exact feigned humility!
And this for me goes on and on to the point of nausea.
| | |
| The past month has been good to me.
I dont remember a lot of what has happened between my past update and now.
Actually, I dont think Ive done anything of note since my last update.
Im really loving this cold weather though.
Ive been doing a lot of reading and writing lately.
I enjoy writing. It really helps me clear my head.
This weekend is gonna be really boring, but next week is going to be amazing.
I took a big chunk out of my wrist today cause it hit a wall wrong.
I havnt been doing any crunches or pull ups for the past week.
Working to be a fireman is hard. But I wouldnt want to be one if it wasnt.
I cant wait for my hair to grow out again.
Ive been realizing how apocalyptic the world really is lately.
I think its making me cynical and depressed.
But God is here in this apocalypse, and thats comforting. This is my life
I might as well live it
Along with the bad times
Just glad to be living
And this is my time
I might as well share it
I'll give you all my money
We live and we die for this | | |
| These past few weeks have been alright.
Everything seems to go a little slower when you dont have anything to do.
Lawrence with Margaret was fun, we ended up just walking around for 4 hours.
I thoroughly enjoyed myself.
Ive been trying not to waste my life so much. I think its working.
I think Ive been on the phone for at least two hours every night.
September 22 Jackass II comes out, and I cannot wait.
Ive been reading Judges lately. Its a nice change from most new testament books.
I wish God still called us to fight for Him.
I cant wait till the weather gets colder.
Xanga really isnt that interesting anymore.
I need to find a real job soon.
I ordered some clothes and shoes the other day online.
I feel like recapping on my summer thus far.               But the point is, I miss me sum summer. What we can be, can never be taken away from us
Let's raise our fists in the air, let's make a difference,
let's start a revolution, lets start a fire,
get back to when we still had something to say | | |
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